Heart Attacks, Patriotic Songs and Manoj Kumar

All this talk of Bollywood suddenly reminds me of one of the worst (in a very good and delightful way) pieces of cinema, starring Manoj Kumar. Clerk. For starters, Manoj Kumar is this annoyed “young” man who is constantly stubbing out cigarettes. But the most rib-splitting scene in this film is this – Manoj Kumar’s dad – Ashok Kumar has a heart attack. The doctor refuses to come to treat him. Manoj Kumar informs everyone that since he bought two batteries on his way home, he can save their father. We wait, our breath held, assuming maybe he’ll plug those batteries into something and make a defibrillator out of an ordinary household item – showing us how innovative Indians are.

Nope. He informs everyone that he’s going to play a patriotic song. Because his dad is so patriotic, his heart becomes okay, because his body wants to march to the song. So from his deathbed, Ashok Kumar starts madly waving his limbs and begins marching. Then, he commands that the casette player be stopped, as he is fit enough to sing on his own and that the others should join them. At this point, the various people in the room – some three men, one girl and the mom start marching to the song. My friend noticed that the girl was marching a bit further from everyone else – and said maybe she had her period, and the director made her act while maintaining the “purity” distance. That single comment had me laughing and wiping my tears off for the next ten minutes.

So here’s the fabulous video. I demand that you sit down to watch it.